foolishwren | [Action in the ~*~Goldenrod Department Store~*~] FOURTH WALL EVENT POST

_{[OOC: HI GUYS. As per usual with my TL;DR event posts, reading this is more or less optional. All you need to know is that Heather's in the Goldenrod City Department Store, and that you are free to bother her in ANY WAY YOU SEE FIT, anywhere in the store.
Posts on my end might be a little slow, but I AM online and will be replying to every tag!
Out-of-game dudes, welcome to Route for the weekend! I hope you enjoy your stay, and hope that maybe we'll be snagging a few of you for good. ;)]}

_{[Well, Saturday came, and despite the injuries and wreckage accumulated at the Department Store from the aftermath of that robbery, a big mall can't staff itself! As such, the employees have all been respectfully ordered to come back and help with cleaning things up, because god forbid they close the store for a few days!]

[And so, wearing her stupid little employee uniform, a tired Heather got up early with her newly-recovered Pokemon in-pocket (she didn't normally take them to work with her, but given the events there, she was feeling less confident about the prospect of being without them in case of an emergency. And besides, she sort of wanted to spoil them a little bit for all they'd been through), and made her way morosely to the big shiny building.]

[The whole way, Cujo pranced and gamboled around her, completely oblivious to his Trainer's sour mood.]

[She shoved the revolving door a little harder than necessary and went through it, taking care not to let the simple-minded Growlithe get stuck in the turnstyle.]

[And gueeeessss who was right there waiting in the lobby for her, surrounded by bustling janitors carrying around busted vending machines and sweeping up rubble?]}

ABOUT TIME YOU SHOWED UP!

BACK IN MY DAY, SNOTTY KIDS WHO TOOK TOO MUCH TIME OFF OF WORK WERE FLOGGED AND PUBLICLY HUMILIATED!

.... And back in your day, the elderly fell behind and got eaten by saber-toothed tigers...

WHAT WAS THAT?!

Ugh... nothing...

I'VE HAD ABOUT ENOUGH OF YOUR LIP. MY DELICATE HEART CANNOT ABIDE SUCH DISRESPECT. GO HELP THE JANITORS ON THE SECOND FLOOR BEFORE YOUR INSOLENCE BEGINS TO ENDANGER MY HEALTH.

Yes, ma'am...

AND GET THAT FILTHY MUTT IN A POKEBALL IMMEDIATELY!!

_{[Making a sour face, Heather promptly flipped the old bat off as she went huffing away to scream at someone else who didn't deserve it.]}

Don't listen to 'er, Cooj. You might be a filthy mutt, but she's a bitch and that's ten times worse. We gotta stop at the laundry room first. I'll let you chew on one of her skirts.

_{[Cujo panted up at her happily, having absolutely no idea that the supervisor had called him anything, and promptly walked into a potted plant because he wasn't watching where he was going.]}

~*~

_{[The employee laundry room yawned ominously away from the doorway, its gray-green basement lights buzzing in that ugly way that old, out-of-date electronics that no higher-up has felt necessary to replace so often do. The gaps between the tiles here were always wet, and filled with that gritty mush that resulted when bits of powdered laundry detergent spilled onto a damp floor and was allowed to sit. The whole place smelled like stagnant water from the machine in the corner that was always broken and filled up with cloudy water that nobody bothered to drain for weeks.]

[Old uniforms were strewn across the floor like corpses of long-forgotten staff members who had been trapped down here and died horribly.]}

... Same old, same old...

_{[Heather sighed and stepped in, her boots skidding slightly on the soapscum-covered floor.]}

Don't eat anything I don't tell you is okay, Cooj.

_{[She leaned over the bin of clean uniforms, digging around in it with still-bandaged arms. She needed a new hat and didn't fancy getting screamed at for not having one if she was caught without it on the job.]}

Jesus, there can't be like fifty thousand clean shirts and no hats...

_{[Then she stopped and looked over her shoulder, brows furrowed. Cujo was standing stiffly behind her, his creamy hackles raised and normally-happy brown eyes wide and staring. A low, unsettled growl was drifting out of his throat and his stare was settled firmly on the employee lockers across the room. Swallowing, Heather withdrew from the bin slowly.]}

... What is it, boy?

_{[The growl increased in volume, and Heather frowned worriedly, following his gaze.]

[The source of his anxiety became clear instantly.]

[The door to Locker no. 9 was rattling gently, occasionally thumping. There was something inside it. Trying to get out.]

[The hairs on the back of Heather's neck stood up.]

[... It's... it's deja vu all over again...]

[The rattling was replaced by an insistent, metallic banging. Heather gulped, and reached out to pick up a nearby metal laundry basket.]}

Stay here, Cooj...

_{[Slowly, warily, she approached the locker. As though sensing her nearing presence, the banging became louder and more violent. Adamant. Biting her lip, Heather reached out with a bandaged hand... and opened the locker.]}

--AAAUGH!

_{[The laundry basket went clanging to the floor as Heather fell backwards, knocked onto the damp, gritty floor as whatever was in the locker came lunging out at her like a desperate predator, barreling its warm weight into her chest and knocking her off-balance. Cujo erupted into a frenzy of barking and whimpering, knocking over the laundry bin as he turned in alarmed circles.]

[Heather thrashed on the floor, throwing the attacker off in the process and struggling to sit up defensively, teeth bared.]}

I-- GET OFF! I'LL-- You-- .... uh. .... Huh?

_{[The attacker wagged its little cinnamon-bun of a tail, the speaker on its headphones giving out a cheery little crackle of static.]}

ARF!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ HEATHER WHERE ARE YOU I NEED HUGS AND SOMEONE TO PREVENT ME FROM BREAKING LIKE A CHEAP JIGSAW PUZZLE

In other words

There is a very exhausted and frazzled idol stumbling into your store. ]

_{[As it happens, an equally-exhausted and frazzled Heather is wandering through the lobby with a mop in hand, looking dazed. This has been a VERY eerie-ass day and the worst part is, THAT FRIGGIN' SUPERVISOR WON'T EVEN BELIEVE HER. ABOUT ANYTHING.]

[IT'S... IT'S UNFAIR, IT'S CRUEL, IT'S-- ... Rise?]}

W-- whoa, Rise, I thought you were in Violet!

H-Heather?

[ oh god here comes the pitiful tiny voice. ]

I was, b-but then I ended up here somehow, and some guy on a horse gave me flowers and I got chased by a giant pitcher of juice and stalked by a car, and Lea and Isa don't have hearts when they grow up, and there's my Shadow--

_{[.... Pitiful tiny voice, oh honey come over here and let Heather hug you. :(]

[Heather is already staggering over to Rise to do just that.]}

Jeez, sounds like your day is as weird as mine-- wait, a CAR?

Y-yeah, and that wasn't even the weirdest one.

[ Heatheeeeeer ;w; ]

_{[... :( You poor thing.]

[Heather grabs Rise in a firm hug.]}

Okay-- things'll be okay, all right? It is-- I don't even know, the world just decided to go COMPLETELY cray-cray for a day or something. I DON'T EVEN KNOW.

[ SHE IS JUST CLINGING. Adaptation skills have been put through the wringer all in one day. ]

_{[IT'S OKAY, BIG SIS IS HERE NOW AND SHE WILL BEAT ANYTHING ELSE WEIRD TO SHOW UP TO DEATH. WITH HER FACE.]}

You're white as a sheet, dude-- come on, I'll find a BENCH or something...

[ Heather my hero. ;w; Rise manages a shaky nod, getting herself under control to at least move her legs in a walking-like motion. ]

_{[Staying in the lobby's a bad idea, because let's face it, if ANYTHING shows up, it's gonna walk through the front door. But being totally alone isn't a good idea either, because... yeah. Bad shit has shown up when Heather's alone.]

[So she settles for the first-floor food court.]}

Just sit down at this table and BREATHE. If you faint or something, I bet my supervisor will walk past RIGHT THEN and assume I killed you or something.

[ she smiles weakly at that and sucks in a breath. ] I'd be a pretty bad idol if stress made me pass out.

_{[She pats Rise on the shoulder.]}

Good, keep up the not-fainting thing. I'm gonna go get us something to drink and/or pour over our heads in an attempt to wake up in case this day is some kind of crazy dream.

[ wryly ] Wanna bring towels too in case it isn't?

Roger, I'll grab a few of those, too.

_{[Shooting a reassuring grin at the idol, she heads off through the crowd towards one of the little kiosk-style places where unhealthy food and soda are sold by the pound.]}

[ in the meantime, Rise will work on calming down. Slowly, but surely. Thank god for Heather. ]

_{[THANK GOD INDEED. Or just-- ... thank Heather. She technically is one if you tilt your head and squint, though she sort of likes to forget about that unless absolutely necessary.]

[In any case, she soon returns with a couple cups of iced soda and hands one to Rise.]}

Here. This'll help.

... Thanks. [ Rise accepts the cup and takes a slow sip. ] I thought the stuff that happened the other months was crazy, but this kinda takes the cake.

_{[Heather groans a little and sags into a seat with her own soda.]}

Honestly?

I'm not entirely sure this isn't a dream. You would not BELIEVE the stuff I've seen.

Try me.

... So.

A giant zombie with biceps the size of cows and no lower jaw tried to kill me for fifteen consecutive minutes.

And before that, I found a dog with headphones.

.... And then there was the Kool-Aid Man.

That stupid pitcher chased you too?!

[ ... and zombie what. ]

... Oh my god, I wasn't the only one?!

THE THIRD FLOOR IS FULL OF HOLES!!!

I was blamed for ALL of them!!!

How!? Didn't anyone else see something that large??

I DON'T KNOW!

I just-- I was running, and he was yelling like a creepy forty-year-old uncle watching Victoria's Secret commercials and making everybody else in the room really uncomfortable with his enthusiasm, and then suddenly he was gone and there were a bunch of holes in the walls and EVERYONE WAS LOOKING AT ME.

... Well, that's stupid. There's no way you could have done that on your own!

[Action in the ~~Goldenrod Department Store~~] FOURTH WALL EVENT POST

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