Heather Mason (
foolishwren) wrote2011-08-18 05:17 pm
Entry tags:
- *ace attorney: miles edgeworth,
- *dcmk: kaito kuroba,
- *fullmetal alchemist: envy,
- *kingdom hearts: minnie mouse,
- *metal gear solid: hal 'otacon' emmerich,
- *persona 4: rise kujikawa,
- *psychonauts: sasha,
- *silent hill: claudia wolf,
- *silent hill: father vincent,
- *silent hill: harry mason,
- *silent hill: henry townshend,
- *transformers (movie): ironhide,
- *umineko no naku koro ni: beatrice,
- *yu-gi-oh!: bakura,
- *yu-gi-oh!: crow hogan,
- @harry,
- @henry,
- aaaaangst,
- accidental video,
- action,
- bad memories,
- brooding mcbroodypants,
- butch,
- concerned heather is concerned,
- enter claudia,
- fear for the flesh,
- fucking fuckity fuck,
- godzilla,
- holding my heart out but clutching it to,
- huh villain what's goin on with that vil,
- i've got a bad feeling about this,
- ic,
- notto dissu shitto agen,
- olivine city,
- past lives,
- private message,
- quagsire,
- shaking fists at the sky,
- shoulda coulda woulda,
- silent hill survivors club,
- so ronery,
- text,
- the town that takes all,
- totodile,
- unexplained anxiety,
- video
76. [Accidental Video/Text/Action for Olivine]
[The feed opens in a decidedly innocent fashion. It's jauntily wobbling back and forth as its holder walks, and the screen is filled by a big blue :D face, backed by an even bluer sky. ... And the occasional waving green tips from the sand dunes he's passing. Yes, Butch the Quagsire is on the beach, waddling happily down to the shore with Heather's 'Gear-- perhaps stolen in hopes of being able to carry on a happy WOOOOO-filled long-distance conversation with Flapper.]
[But an angry-sounding gurgle rings out behind him-- and Butch turns to face his pursuer, who is equally blue, but a great deal smaller.]
Ttt-t-toto!
QUAAAA--
[What follows is a very shaky view of the sky jittering around as the two Pokemon engage in a fierce tug-of-war over the gadget. Occasionally their faces pop into view, and while it's more or less impossible for a Quagsire to actually look angry, it's obvious that it's a heated debate. Finally, apparently deciding that it's too much trouble, Butch lets go of the 'Gear with a huffy 'QUA!' and waddles off.]
[Godzilla's concerned red eyes appear in front of the screen as he checks over the 'Gear delicately, as if checking to make sure it wasn't damaged. Anyone who's gotten used to the Totodile's presence in Heather's transmissions before may note that he seems a lot more... contrite than usual, maybe? Which has actually been the case ever since the OMNOM ELBOW incident a couple months before... strange.]
[In any case, once satisfied, he sets off waddling back across the sand, determinedly. If anyone's actually cared enough to keep watching that long (or is just tuning in now), his destination becomes apparent immediately.]
[In a shady spot juuuuust where the sand starts to shift over to grass and trees, Heather is sprawled on her back on an unused old picnic table, arms folded behind her head, along with her wadded-up vest for a pillow. There's a few old chip bags and soda bottles scattered around the little sun-dappled area, but it would seem that whoever left them had probably packed up and left much earlier, since Heather's the only one there.]
[... That's probably why she's there... judging from the dull, despondent quality of the way she's staring up at the foliage above.]
[And then she's lost from view briefly, as Godzilla struggles to clamber up to her, first onto the bench-seat, and then the tabletop itself. Then he's standing next to her and fumbling with the 'Gear, giving viewers a view first of her jeans pocket, then one hand, then the card-deck pattern on her shirt, then (inexplicably) a zoomed-in view of worn-out wooden table-top, before it finally settles on her face as he presents the 'Gear to her with a self-important gurgle that can only be an attempt to tattle on Butch.]
[At first, she doesn't even turn her head. It's pretty obvious her mind is elsewhere. But when he tries again, this time nudging her shoulder with the 'Gear, a flicker of irritability crosses her face and she looks over.]
... Zilla, what--
[... Oh. It's the 'Gear. ... And the damn red light is blinking.]
[... Heather frowns with lidded eyes and shoves the 'Gear away.]
Get that thing outta my face.
[The Totodile makes an apologetic (and slightly hurt) sound, but relinquishes the 'Gear when she takes it and ends the feed abruptly.]
[Private text to Harry Mason and Henry Townshend]
[But an angry-sounding gurgle rings out behind him-- and Butch turns to face his pursuer, who is equally blue, but a great deal smaller.]
Ttt-t-toto!
QUAAAA--
[What follows is a very shaky view of the sky jittering around as the two Pokemon engage in a fierce tug-of-war over the gadget. Occasionally their faces pop into view, and while it's more or less impossible for a Quagsire to actually look angry, it's obvious that it's a heated debate. Finally, apparently deciding that it's too much trouble, Butch lets go of the 'Gear with a huffy 'QUA!' and waddles off.]
[Godzilla's concerned red eyes appear in front of the screen as he checks over the 'Gear delicately, as if checking to make sure it wasn't damaged. Anyone who's gotten used to the Totodile's presence in Heather's transmissions before may note that he seems a lot more... contrite than usual, maybe? Which has actually been the case ever since the OMNOM ELBOW incident a couple months before... strange.]
[In any case, once satisfied, he sets off waddling back across the sand, determinedly. If anyone's actually cared enough to keep watching that long (or is just tuning in now), his destination becomes apparent immediately.]
[In a shady spot juuuuust where the sand starts to shift over to grass and trees, Heather is sprawled on her back on an unused old picnic table, arms folded behind her head, along with her wadded-up vest for a pillow. There's a few old chip bags and soda bottles scattered around the little sun-dappled area, but it would seem that whoever left them had probably packed up and left much earlier, since Heather's the only one there.]
[... That's probably why she's there... judging from the dull, despondent quality of the way she's staring up at the foliage above.]
[And then she's lost from view briefly, as Godzilla struggles to clamber up to her, first onto the bench-seat, and then the tabletop itself. Then he's standing next to her and fumbling with the 'Gear, giving viewers a view first of her jeans pocket, then one hand, then the card-deck pattern on her shirt, then (inexplicably) a zoomed-in view of worn-out wooden table-top, before it finally settles on her face as he presents the 'Gear to her with a self-important gurgle that can only be an attempt to tattle on Butch.]
[At first, she doesn't even turn her head. It's pretty obvious her mind is elsewhere. But when he tries again, this time nudging her shoulder with the 'Gear, a flicker of irritability crosses her face and she looks over.]
... Zilla, what--
[... Oh. It's the 'Gear. ... And the damn red light is blinking.]
[... Heather frowns with lidded eyes and shoves the 'Gear away.]
Get that thing outta my face.
[The Totodile makes an apologetic (and slightly hurt) sound, but relinquishes the 'Gear when she takes it and ends the feed abruptly.]
[Private text to Harry Mason and Henry Townshend]
Hey
I was thinking maybe we could try and head east to Ecruteak City in a few days??
We've been here awhile now
[Video]
[But the anger still smoulders...]
[At the same time, though, there's a little relief, too.]
[Enough that ... for what's probably the first time since Claudia arrived, the hostility in Heather's voice fades enough for there to be a questioning note in it. A hopefulness.]
So... you're not going to hurt Dad anymore, right?
[Not 'my father'.... 'Dad'.]
[Video]
...no.
[Of course not.
Alessa, this is Paradise. You should know better.]
[Video]
[No as in... she wouldn't hurt him, or no as in 'Of course I will. Why would you suggest anything otherwise?']
[The second option is wrong and she knows it, but it still sends a chill down her spine. No matter what she knows is real, nothing will ever stop the memory of finding her father's body from slipping back in front of her eyes so intensely and powerfully that it's almost like it's happening all over again...]
.... So... you won't?
[HURRAY FOR REPEATING THE EXACT SAME QUESTION. Except this time, Heather's voice is even more questioning. It's probably the first time it's become audible in her voice that under all the anger and rage, she is scared.]
Re: [Video]
I did what I had to.
[Then, more gently:]
Alessa... your hate and pain are not needed here. It is time to let it go.
[Video]
[Needless to say, the first answer makes Heather's eyes narrow... but the second just sort of smacks her soundly and legitimately makes her mouth drop open. In shock? In anger? Maybe in both.]
[Part of her... some deep, often-neglected part of her, realizes that Claudia has a point... however misguided. But most of her overpowers that part. Heather shakes.]
How-- ... how dare you... how could you even...
You TORTURED me!
You killed him, and then you-- you made me-- it HURT!
HOW can you tell me to LET GO?!
After what you DID to me-- to Dad! What you almost did to the WORLD!
How could you?!
[Claudia is no doubt familiar with the way Heather's voice rises to a raspy squeak and breaks when she's emotional... It's possibly even worse now since she shouted herself hoarse the other night.]
How could you?!
[Video] This icon forever.
She listens, waiting for the end of the storm, but doesn't say anything; not until Heather finishes. When she does speak, it is not warm or assuaging--but it's far from cold either, her words meted out in that deliberate, measured way Heather has surely come to know and love.]
Are you saying that you want to hold onto it?
[Video]
[Heather just sort of... gapes for a moment or two.]
... I-- .... no!
[Hurrrrr?]
It--
It doesn't WORK like that!
[Video]
She mostly sounds exhausted and long-suffering when she speaks... that, and deceptively, wearyingly old.]
Then how does it work?
Alessa, when will you accept the things that you know are in your heart?
[Video]
[But right now, by contrast ... she sounds very young. Not that this will surprise Claudia...]
When you hurt another person, they don't just forget about it!
Because it STILL HURTS!
And NOTHING will make it stop hurting! Not Paradise, not enlightenment, not forgiveness, not even getting Dad back! It'll ALWAYS hurt! And YOU did that! You and Mommy and everyone else in that damn cult who stood by and let it happen!
[Video]
And then what?
Is this the end, Alessa?
Will your pain drive you away from the place you called home?
The place where you rightfully belonged?
[Video]
[The video cuts out. She's turned off her screen-- without hanging up entirely. When she speaks again, her voice is low and shaky, but that hapless squawk that usually fills it when Heather is upset is gone now. It's her turn to sound old.]
The last time I called that place home was when I was seven years old, the night before my mother put on a mask, held me down, and let a bunch of other masked people do things to me that would make you sick.
After that?
It wasn't home.
It was Hell.
[Video]
When she speaks, however, it is first with vehement disbelief; then her voice gets oddly... quiet.]
Dahlia?
No.
....Alessa, what happened?
[Voice]
[Those memories weren't repressed. Not anymore. They hadn't been for a long time-- not since she had started remembering on that horrible night two years before. But they didn't... constantly float in front of her mind's eye. They were tucked away far enough that she could forget about them sometimes ... long enough to feel normal for awhile.]
[But saying that... just speaking those words bring those memories back so powerfully that for just a second or two, Heather can't even MOVE. It's so clear, so acute, that even Claudia's question doesn't get an answer for a second or ten except for-- at one point-- a very quiet, trembling breath.]
[When said question DOES sink in, something about it makes her insides clench almost as much as the memory does.]
[Her voice isn't much more than a mumble.]
... They never told you...
[It's not a surprise... of course they wouldn't have.]
[Never would have.]
[Claudia must have known that Alessa's fate had been painful, of course... pain was what was needed to nurture God... but she didn't know the whole story. Somewhere deep down, Heather knew Claudia didn't know the whole story.]
[Maybe if she had...]
[Voice]
She can't have anything to say.
There is so much she doesn't understand (even if she doesn't realise it yet), and she is left waiting while Heather mumbles barely-comprehensibly into the microphone. After a long delay, however, she breaks the silence, prompting Heather to further explanation.]
Alessa...?
[Voice]
[But this time... the reluctance isn't out of anger. It's not that the anger is gone... HELL no it isn't gone. But this runs deeper than what Claudia had done to her. Far deeper. And somehow, finding out that Claudia didn't know... makes things so much more complicated than simply being able to look at it the same black-and-white way she wants to.]
[Not that it hadn't been complicated before... but god, this is all just so messed up...]
... I--...
[Alessa, even at the tender age of seven, had tried her best to keep her sensitive younger friend safe from whatever hurt she could... tried her best to hide how the bullying both at school and at home got to her, so that Claudia wouldn't be frightened.]
[And as much as Heather hates to admit it... part of her doesn't want to say anything more about what had happened to Alessa on that terrible night for just that reason.]
[And the rest of her doesn't want to say anything because.... well. Because.]
I need to go.
[Voice]
[Claudia starts to protest--but then...
Intellectually, she knows that Alessa can't be completely right here; after all, she knew Dahlia for years afterwards, learned from her. But something in her demands to know, some impetus, some dread--
But remembering that unbreakable trust, that safety she had, the shelter of Alessa's experience...
She can't force Heather to stay and talk to her.]
...all right.
[Voice]
[She pauses for just a moment. She wants to say something-- wants to make some sharp-tongued quip as usual, some little barbed remark that was as much intended to harm Claudia just as much as it was to defend herself against having to think about all this too much... but there's no such words that come to mind.]
[Not even the usually-ever-present wit of Heather Mason can snipe away the paralyzing dread of calling up that memory ... and the feelings that come with it.]
[She swallows hard... and then hangs up the call.]