foolishwren | 84. FOURTH WALL video/action/whatever. GO NUTS. Backdated a little to the morning.

_{[Another day, another long shift at work. Heather doesn't really mind, though. It's one hell of a difference between the hectic stress of the job in the department store that she had last year. What a difference having SANE bosses can make, even if the job is more boring.]

[As the morning sun creeps higher behind the snowclouds and lights up the powder drifting down from the sky, Heather is seated at one of the stools behind the counter in the diner where she now works, and is making herself incredibly useful by balancing all the salt-shakers she can find on top of one another.]

[And then putting all those little sealed packets of sliced cheese she can find on top of THOSE.]

[It's a quiet morning, okay? Leave her alone!]

[Needless to say, one of the owners of the diner-- an old married couple-- spots his newest employee working on the Leaning Tower of Cheesa and just sort of shakes his head, sighing. Kids these days.]}

Miss Mason, as much as I hate to stifle the budding artist in you, the soda machines need cleaning.

_{[Heather heaves an enormously-dramatic mock sigh as she gets up.]}

Ugh, finnneeee. You're just jealous of my deeply creative spirit.

You got me. I'm turning green. Dish-soap should be in the back.

_{[Having chill bosses is AWESOME. Heather had decided she liked having bosses she could banter with almost as soon as she got the job. She sticks her tongue out at him as she passes, on her way to the back door. And then she has an idea!]

[Pulling out her 'Gear, she hits the network button.]}

HEY GUYS. Who wants to watch me CLEAN SHIT?

_{[Because clearly if she had to do boring things, it would improve everybody else's lives to watch her do them.]

[But behind her, the boss clears his throat meaningfully, and Heather rolls her eyes.]}

Oh, that's just Danny!

_{[OOC: COME AT ME BROS. Feel free to assume that Heather is elsewhere if you don't feel like dealing with Danny-- 4th Wall is like CRACK: THE EVENT, so I'm happy to stick her wherever.]}

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I didn't know he was THERE!

Well now you know! Now we all know!

[And knowing is half the battle! He has no idea what the other half is when dealing with SURPRISE UPSIDE DOWN CORPSE!]

And what are you going to do about it?

[He's not exactly a good person, but SURPRISE IT'S DANNY sounds like something most people would call the police about.]

_{[To be fair, Heather doesn't really know either.]

[Shooting the body up with a sub-machine gun certainly wouldn't work. She'd know. That's what she did the LAST time Danny popped up unexpectedly.]}

I don't know! Tell my boss?!

Brilliant plan...unless your boss is the one who put him there!

[Don't mind Cobra, just jumping to conclusions.]

_{[It's okay, Cobra. Considering the nature of the phenomenon that is Danny, it's not like Heather has much more of an idea how he got there than you do.]}

I'm pretty sure if my boss tried to hang a body up like that, he'd throw his back out.

That's what he wants you to think! That way you won't suspect anything!

... No. Really.

I know for a fact that my boss did not kill this man.

Then who did?

[There went his plan to make Heather paranoid and laugh at the results.]

_{[... And here goes Heather's.]}

I did.

It was me.

_{[... She sounds completely and utterly serious.]}

You...what?

Killed the guy.

You did not!

You tellin' me what I did or didn't do?

Yessss, I am! I don't believe you!

Good.

People like you are why I can get away with this stuff.

What is that supposed to mean?

Thanks to upstanding skeptics like yourself, I can kill with no consequence.

I am a monster.

And nobody knows it.

Thank you.

Now I know it! And I'm going to tell everyone! Even though I don't believe you!

[Muhahahaha.]

Yeah?

And who'll believe you?

Lots of people! Most of them are stupid and will believe anything!

Yeah, uh, hate to break it to you, but even a stupid person would have a hard time believing a guy who wears a blue hood and sounds like a cat stuck in a trash can.

I do not sssound like that! Take that back!

What if I don't?

Then I'll find you and make you take it back!

All right. Where am I?

[Video]

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[Video] Oh good I still have subject lines here yay

[Video] ;-; YES. Custom comment pages are the lesser of two evils, I say.

[Video] I agree!

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