99. [Text/Action for travel group]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[SO YEAH, UH. IT'S BEEN. A FEW DAYS. SINCE... YOU KNOW.]

[Since the whole thing on the weekend that they all remember now.]

[In those few days, Heather has been holed up in her hotel room like a dysfunctional pop star hiding from the paparazzi. What's she been doing in there? GOD ONLY KNOWS. Actually, the people IN that hotel room know and it's mostly being quiet and sleeping a lot, but there you go.]

[BUT LO AND BEHOLD: a text!]

[A text with a request.]</sub>


SUP PEOPLE

I have a mission for all of you


send me funny shit

any funny shit

I don't care if it's a joke or a story about the time your drunk uncle bill mistook your annoying aunt sally's drink for a spitoon or a video of that fat Meowrth that likes to get in boxes i forget his name it's like Maroo or something

1 2 3 GO

Comments

[text/image]

[quickattackjack]

_{[There is no text. There is only a grainy photo attached to the message, obviously taken by Jack's poke'gear.}

ghost/ice type.poke

[text/image]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[... JESUS JACK SHE SAID FUNNY NOT DISTURBING.]

[... but it is pretty funny.]</sub>

holy crap

is this what you saw when you died

[text]

[quickattackjack]

I found them in a store here in town. I was going to hand them out to the children near Halloween, but I decided that was a bit cruel.

[text]

[foolishwren]

good call

i'm pretty sure giving something like that to a kid is legally defined as child abuse

[text]

[quickattackjack]

I'd rather not go to poke'jail.

[text]

[foolishwren]

yeah itd sort of be a bummer

i mean not that you'd be in there too long but...

_{[Jack. Hey Jack. Ask her why she doesn't think you'd be in there that long. Do it.]}

[text]

[quickattackjack]

Why is that?

_{[It was an innocent question. He knew little about the justice system in Johto.]}

[text]

[foolishwren]

because you could just slip through the bars and walk away!

_{[JAIL CELLS AIN'T BUILT TO HOLD PIPECLEANER SKELETONS.]}

[text]

[quickattackjack]

You can't hear it, but I am slow-clapping.

[text]

[foolishwren]

i'm here till tuesday






tip your waitresses

[text]

[quickattackjack]

If you're good, I'll send you a box for Christmas.

[text]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[Unwittingly, Jack's quip sends a pang of sick shame through her. Because... well. Not that she was gonna be all cliche and get hung up on the words 'good' or 'bad' and whether or not they fit somebody who'd let what happened on the weekend happen, but bleugh.]

[Not that she's gonna say anything about that. The point of this is to laugh.]</sub>

GOOD?


man i dunno jack that's asking a lot

can you really expect me to go against my primal nature

[text]

[quickattackjack]

<sub>[Jack is oblivious to Heather's dismay. When That Weekend rolled around, he'd been in his study working away when a schoolbus passed his window.]

[He'd been upstairs.]

[The skeleton decided it would be best to just stay indoors that day.]</sub>

That all depends on how badly you want ugly Gengar popsicles.

[text]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[... Yeah. Good idea.]

[If only Heather'd had an early warning like that.]</sub>



... wait

shouldn't you send me those if I've been BAD???

[text]

[quickattackjack]

They are hideous, but delicious!

[text]

[foolishwren]

now you've got me all confused

should i be good for the deliciousness or bad for the hideousness????

JACK MY BRAIN CAN'T HANDLE THIS


[text]

[quickattackjack]

You cannot escape Grapegar.

[text]

[foolishwren]

_{[... PFFF okay she's laughing now.]}

so what you're saying is i'll get one whether i'm good OR bad

[text]

[quickattackjack]

Precisely!

[text]

[foolishwren]

y'know i think you'd have made a fine santa after all

_{[SHE appreciates his philosophy, anyway!]}