Heather Mason (
foolishwren) wrote2013-06-01 05:07 pm
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Entry tags:
105. FOURTH WALL POST [Action for Saffron City, anywhere in Saffron City! Video's okay too]
[You know what?]
[Heather's not even sure why she TRIES anymore.]

[So done. So done.]
Here we go again.
... Yes, Cooj, I still love you.
Just not right now.
[Heather's not even sure why she TRIES anymore.]

[So done. So done.]
Here we go again.
... Yes, Cooj, I still love you.
Just not right now.
no subject
... He's not?
[It's a baffled, childlike question. You can almost hear the BUH? in her head. She's even quiet for a second or two before-- at long last, a babble more reminiscent of how she normally talks, even if it's a little tense and unhappy, flows out.]
--I... I even learned how to ride.
Horses.
I can ride Carousel now.
Not that well, but-- I was gonna--
--if he showed up...
no subject
[And a bit of pride, too, flashing by. She's resourceful. She had a plan. She's a fighter. But still ...]
He won't bother you again. [That's not an absolute truth, but this is:] Not if I can prevent it.
[That has always been true. The difference now is that if Heather cares to read between the lines, she might find the fact that he DOES have a say now, or at least something like it.]
no subject
[There's a definite difference, even if she doesn't know the truth behind it. Before, he had never promised to protect her. He'd never once said that BOB wouldn't do anything.]
[He had been completely, 100% honest about his depressing powerlessness when it came to the whole situation.]
... Coop...
no subject
[On the whole, he feels stronger, and this is with good reason. He thinks that in time he can learn to navigate his new reality enough to help make a difference.]
[He's already started. He found the way back here before BOB did.]
[Of course, there's a reason BOB isn't here right now, and that is a reason he doesn't think he could ever share with Heather. Even though there might come a time when he should.]
[He touches a hand to his mouth, a subtle gesture of ... a few little things. As much as he feels better in spirit, his soul is old and weary and has seen too many years and yet it's entirely new and much too young.]
I found the place he comes from. [It sounds like the start of an explanation but it stops there.]
no subject
[Because... he WOULD, wouldn't he? Of course he'd be able to crack the case. To hunt the monster down. Of COURSE he would!]
[Her next question is ... surprisingly calm. But blunt.]
Is he dead?
[Because Heather logic = find the place the monster comes from and then MURDER THEM IN THEIR OWN HOUSE]
no subject
[He's surprisingly calm in that answer, too. He wouldn't lie to her about this - BOB isn't dead. He doesn't even know how to go about killing him.]
[And there's the fact that Coop knows better than anyone how wrong an attempt at action behind enemy lines can go.]
[But there's a pain in him too and even if it's not immediately apparent, it's there in all of him. A pain he's accepting all too willingly. He can still see the drapes at the edges of his vision when he so much as blinks and he knows he has to be trapped between them. It hurts that that's his fate. But he has to accept his position and do what he can from there, not mourn the other two worlds he made his homes any more than he has to.]
[All of that colours that single syllable. Then he sighs and tells the closest thing to a lie he feels like he's ever told.]
But he's not here.
no subject
[There's a moment where she just sort of... nods, as though taking in the information... and then without warning, she leans over to throw her arms around the agent. Tightly.]
[... Possibly uncomfortably tightly. All scrawny appearances aside, the kid has a strong grip.]
no subject
[He missed her so much. She's one of the people who mattered the most to him here and there's an undeniable relief to him in what she just did, because he'd much rather spend this time close to her in the way they used to be than as wary strangers who once shared a past.]
[He hugs her and he still feels bad that he's not telling her the truth but he's so damn sure it'd only cause more harm than not, so ... now, he just wants to make sure she's okay.]
[He'll disappear once more and he needs to know she'll be alright before he leaves.]
I missed you, [he tells to her hair, a murmur of sorts. Has to direct that phrase to HER, at least once. Her personally. Cause she matters.]
no subject
[All of them had hurt in their own special way, and she wouldn't be forgetting any of them any time soon.]
[But losing Cooper had been like a physical punch to the gut. Like a mugging. Staggering home with blackened eyes and dealing with the fact that someone who'd become so personal and familiar to you that being without them felt like being without the photos of your kids in your wallet or the charm your late grandmother had given you a few months before she passed was the closest emotional approximation that Heather could make when it came to describing losing Cooper.]
[You get too close to something, perhaps without even meaning to, and you take it for granted.]
[And you stop knowing that it-- or they-- can still be taken away from you when you're least ready for it.]
... Coop, I miss you so much.
[It's not the first time she's said something croaky like that from the depths of wherever she's buried her face against his suit, but it's the first time in AWHILE, anyway.]
no subject
[He knows it wasn't his choice but he still says it like it is - although not because he blames himself. It's not an apology he expresses but a kind of condolence. He knows how he would have felt if he'd stayed to see HER disappear, after all.]
[He breathes out in a slow, soft sigh, and hugs her a bit tighter before aiming to pull back a little.]
I wish I could stay.
no subject
[But she knows that's not how it works. And it wouldn't be fair to ask him that... even though there's that targetless, frustrated resentment bubbling up inside.]
[She lets him pull back a little bit, loosening her own arms so that she can pull back as well, and actually look at him.]
... It's stupid.
I didn't--
.... I thought of all people, you'd...
... You'd still be here...