Heather Mason (
foolishwren) wrote2014-11-28 12:46 am
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119. [FOURTH WALL! ACTION FOR ERRYBODY]
[It's begun.]
[THAT TIME OF YEAR.]
[No, not the time of year when the Christmas decorations start going up in stores-- let's be real, guys, that happened like two months ago.]
[No.]
[It's that time of year when the boundaries between worlds grow thin and all kinds of wild and wonderful things come pouring out of thin air onto the streets for all to watch and enjoy.]
[... And then on the other end of the spectrum, there's...]
WHOA! HEY, EVERYBODY, LOOK! MORE NEW POKEMON!!!
[The shout of an excited Ace Trainer dudebro who never quite got off the September Swarm hype train rings out over the chaos as a small army of... uh... things come bumbling down the sidewalk, ineffectively squawking and bumping into peoples' legs.]
OH! Oh, they're ADORABLE! LOOK! I'm keeping one RIGHT NOW!
[A Poke-Fan sweeps one off of its tiny nub feet and cradles it like an infant while it flops and kicks.]
[A crowd soon forms.]
[No one pays any attention to the trainer hopping up and down at the edge, waving her arms.]

Guys-- GUYS!! STOP!
THOSE AREN'T-- THOSE AREN'T POKEMON, YOU GUYS.
DON'T TRY TO CA-- unbelievable.
[THAT TIME OF YEAR.]
[No, not the time of year when the Christmas decorations start going up in stores-- let's be real, guys, that happened like two months ago.]
[No.]
[It's that time of year when the boundaries between worlds grow thin and all kinds of wild and wonderful things come pouring out of thin air onto the streets for all to watch and enjoy.]
[... And then on the other end of the spectrum, there's...]
WHOA! HEY, EVERYBODY, LOOK! MORE NEW POKEMON!!!
[The shout of an excited Ace Trainer dudebro who never quite got off the September Swarm hype train rings out over the chaos as a small army of... uh... things come bumbling down the sidewalk, ineffectively squawking and bumping into peoples' legs.]
OH! Oh, they're ADORABLE! LOOK! I'm keeping one RIGHT NOW!
[A Poke-Fan sweeps one off of its tiny nub feet and cradles it like an infant while it flops and kicks.]
[A crowd soon forms.]
[No one pays any attention to the trainer hopping up and down at the edge, waving her arms.]

Guys-- GUYS!! STOP!
THOSE AREN'T-- THOSE AREN'T POKEMON, YOU GUYS.
DON'T TRY TO CA-- unbelievable.
[action]
[And it had worked on the dogs a lot more than it had on anything else.]
[But in any case, his suggestion gets a relieved nod. If these moron trainers want 'em, they can have 'em.]
Let's go somewhere that isn't full of weekend bullshittery.
[action]
[BUT, OFF THEY GO. Leaving the trainers to their "next gen pokemon swarm".]
This weekend hasn't been that bad for me. Relatively.
[Famous last words. But for now, everything's going well!]
[action]