IC CONTACT (Victory Road)

[foolishwren]

ffzzbrrttzzckssshhhh

"Yo, it's Heather. I'm probably asleep or one of the Pokemon ate my 'Gear or something so I can't answer you right now. But feel free to leave a message or something.
I'll probably get back to you. ... Probably. Peace out."

Click!



[Need to send Heather a private message, or start up any other thread that doesn't need a log or post of its own? Tag here with the date of the interaction in the subject line!]

[(NOTE: The old contact post containing all threads from Route 29 can be found here!)]

Comments

[foolishwren]

NO

_{[She knows he's kidding BUT ALSO IT'S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE HE ISN'T]}

[exeggutorhead]

can't stop me unless you're in the water too!!



so we can go on vacation right? it's so cold

[foolishwren]

then you might drown ME




but I guess we have been working a lot lately, haven't we...

[exeggutorhead]

noooo never

and yeah we have! i'll come do a cute face at you if I have to

[You're dating a lizard Heather HE'S BEEN TEMPTED WITH NOT BEING COLD AND NOW THAT'S HIS ONLY GOAL]

[foolishwren]

... DON'T THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME, ENVY.





Actually no now you have to do something cute

get over here

[exeggutorhead]

oh no how terrible not my best talent what will I do





yeah okay where are you

[foolishwren]

living room

hurry up buttercup, time's a-wastin

[exeggutorhead]

[It's a few minutes longer than could be expected before Envy comes downstairs.]

[This is because he's put on multiple layers of sweater and scarf and a ridiculous fuzzy hat with a pompom that someone had gotten him one holiday or other. He's really going all in on selling how terribly cold he is and how important it is to go to a nice island.]

[He drapes himself dramatically over the back of the couch to give her his best starving orphan eyes.]

Okay, here I am. So cold. Very cute. How cute do I need to be?

[foolishwren]

<sub>[He isn't the only one who put some thought into this scenario-- although he does have Heather beat. Because she just put on a disdainful expression and propped one leg up fancily. She's trying to look like someone who would cast judgment on someone's cuteness factor.]

[And it's very hard to keep the sneer from cracking when he appears in his five billion layers.]</sub>

Disgustingly.

_{[DO PUPPY EYES FOR HER, PAUPER!]}

[exeggutorhead]

[It's safe to say that this is the most clothed Envy has ever been.]

You're terrible.

[He proceeds to slide the rest of the way over the back of the couch next to her, rearranging himself on the way like some sort of snake to drape over her lap, facing up, the picture of drama. And then, yes. Does puppy eyes up at her. There's practically anime sparkles around him.]

Can't we go on vacation to the beach?

[foolishwren]

<sub>[It's a Christmas miracle.]

[And it's no coincidence that Heather's slid one hand over her mouth under the guise of a yawn as he puts on his show. On her lap. Because he is much better at keeping a straight face than she is, and the anime sparkles are killing her.]</sub>

Hmmm...

You are extremely pitiful...

... Ask again, but as a Victorian orphan slowly perishing of tuberculosis.

[exeggutorhead]

[HE SAW THAT FAKE YAWN and feels extremely pleased with himself about it. But the show must go on. The beach is at stake.]

[He widens his eyes and does his own little pathetic cough into one hand, voice creaky as he goes on.]

My withered lungs need fresh seaside air.....if...if we don't go to the beach....

[cough cough]

The doctor said they would disintegrate....

[foolishwren]

_{[Okay, now she's actively snorting into her hand. He's done it. The sad little cough was the cherry on top.]}

Disintegrate, you say?

I guess I have to agree to the beach.

You probably need to keep your lungs from doing that.

[exeggutorhead]

[SUCCESS]

[He nods solemnly, Victorian tuberculosis waif face still firmly in place.]

Oh yes....they're so important....

But by your great mercy, they're saved...!

[coff coff]

Oh no...oh no it may be too late....

[Time to top this off with a dramatic tragic orphan death scene.]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[The Victorian Tuberculosis Waif Face is going to be a mainstay, she can tell-- was it a mistake to make him this powerful? Possibly.]

[But that will be a problem for Future Heather.]

[Right now she has to play along.]</sub>

OH NO!

If only I hadn't been so busy doing my job at the pollution factory...

You could have been spared...

_{[Taking full advantage of the fact that he's sprawled across her lap like a DRAMA QUEEN, she crumples over him to theatrically blubber directly into his scarf-wrapped neck.]}

[exeggutorhead]

[She did this to herself]

If only....you could revive me into a zombie.....

[He croaks dramatically and flops down. He is deceased.]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[Don't dare her to revive you Envy, she knows where to poke.]

[Fortunately, he's temporarily turned her into a theater kid.]

[She howls. Kind of directly into his ear]</sub>

GOD! WOULD THAT I WERE NOT SUCH A FOOL!

MY BOY IS GONE!!

[exeggutorhead]

[AUGH EAR HOWLING]

[He can't help it, he tries to roll away onto the floor. As bonelessly as possible.]

[foolishwren]

--NO!

MY BOY IS GOING FURTHER AWAY!!

<sub>[She lets him flump onto the floor, though. God knows he's piled on enough padding that it won't hurt. She follows, but just falls to her knees next to him.]

[Around this point in time though, at least one or two of their smaller Pokemon have been drawn over by the commotion. Scarlet is sniffing at the 'body'. DID HE DIED]</sub>

[exeggutorhead]

[THERE HE GOES]

[Oh no though. Oh no a cold wet little lion nose. He is doing his best to keep up the straight face in the face of being Sniffed.]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[HOW DOES A FIRE-TYPE MANAGE TO HAVE SUCH A COLD WET NOSE????? IT'S A MYSTERY.]

[Fortunately, or unfortunately, the nose is very quickly replaced by a large warm paw. BAP.]

[Envy might be trying to keep a straight face, but Heather isn't pretending to be a dead body. She doesn't have to.]</sub>

... Pfffhhaha, Scarlet, this is a very emotional moment. You're being so disrespectful.

[exeggutorhead]

[BAPPED]

[This time he SPUTTERS]

[foolishwren]

--BY GOD! IT'S A MIRACLE!

_{[Scarlet is yoinked away with a MOWP of surprise, and then Heather is hauling Envy into a sitting position, the Litleo now tucked under one arm.]}

HE'S COME BACK TO LIFE!

[exeggutorhead]

[FREE OF LION PAW YES]

[And also free of HORRIBLE DEATH]

[He makes a whole show of coughing back to life, clutching his chest as she pulls him up.]

I can't believe it! Pulled back from the brink...!

It must have been the fire type that did it...clearly I need to be warm to be fully cured....

[foolishwren]

_{[She wipes a dramatic and definitely real tear from one eye, clasping his shoulder firmly.]}

I daresay... you have convinced me.

We shall go to the beach and surf with some dinosaurs.